Thank you for following my blog. It’s super slim right now but I am constantly writing content…just a little timid about putting it out there. May and June are emotional months for me, so my goal every year at this time is focus light and life. Will was diagnosed in June 2009, which was the beginning of our new normal. Many may not understand, but for those who have had a phone call, diagnosis or experience change their entire outlook on life in the blink of an eye. You understand. But I couldn’t let this very important day go by without sharing some love and giving a dose of advice.
When my parents both passed in May of 2015, 17 days apart from each other, we had to reset and begin another new normal. A life without my mom and dad. My mom passed on May 5 that year, a week before Mother’s Day, and I can remember us celebrating with her a week early, realizing she wasn’t going to make that week to the following Sunday.
I don’t have a lot of memories from those last few months she was alive. I think your mind has a way of protecting you; shielding you from a pain that your heart cannot live through again.
But I can tell you I remember the softness in her beautiful brown eyes; I remember how gorgeous her skin looked her last week on this Earth. I remember how proud I was of how strong and hard she fought her 4-month cancer battle. Her attitude NEVER wavered. I remember thinking that my mom was so desperate to live she would have stayed in her bedridden position forever…. just to stay here with us. That is love, and that is what she always did best.
I remember matter of factly telling her how well she was doing and that she was going to be fine despite the fact I knew she was dying…She had so much HOPE and who was I to take that away? I remember holding her hands a few days before passed as she floated between this life and the next. She was awake and talking, but then would turn to the wall and talk to her loved ones in Heaven. I remember her face light up as she spoke to whoever came to her; her face showed love, joy, graciousness to every visitor as if they were right there. Old friends and family members. She showed me a glimpse of heaven, and I am so grateful for those hours that day. It showed me the incredible place she was going, it gave me peace, unlike anything I have ever experienced. And even in her weakest, darkest hour, she showed me the love, guidance, and strength I needed to make it through this life without her. My Mom passed to her eternal home a little after 8 am on May 15, 2008. 17 days later my Dad, my rock and truly my hero left this world to be with her. My dad suffered from advanced heart disease, diabetes, and blindness. He loved my mother down to his core. He simply could not live without his honey… something we knew our heart; A week after my mom passed he fell and broke his hop. During surgery, he suffered his 5th heart attack. 2 days later he passed. The doctors said if he did not want to recover he wouldn’t, and he didn’t; a classic case of broken heart disease.
So here we are. Alone in a big world; a world without Les and Marilyn. I will be honest, I didn’t think I would be able to function in a world without my parents, but I am. Because you do, and why? Because you don’t have a choice but to live. I know it is crazy to look at such an awful situation and see light, but I do. They loved each other more than most. A love that transcended far beyond vows, sickness, and even this world. An unconditional love that was stronger than medical advancements.
You see even in their passing, they taught us a valuable lesson on life and love. My Mom passed at the early age of 61 and my Dad was 69. Sad because they both had so much life left to live and so much left to offer our world, to my children and our family.
I am confident I have two amazing angels in Heaven watching over our family. They were pretty amazing here on Earth, I can’t imagine the work they are doing up there (smile).
So in their honor, we live each day, we love unconditionally, we are who they taught us to be. In their honor, we LIVE. They taught us in their death that life is short; there is no guarantee for tomorrow; So take the trip, smell the flowers, buy the house, go after the dream job, make a difference, DO and LIVE.
If you are blessed enough to have parents still living, may I boldly suggest you love them and hug them like there is no tomorrow? Because, trust me the people you think will be with you, the people you need and love the most, may not. You will wish you had one more hug, one more kiss, one more meal, one more phone call. Time is precious and it is the one thing you cannot buy, get back, negotiate, barter or plead for.
I wish every mom out there “Happy Mother’s Day.” I’m celebrating today by practicing what my Mom did the absolute best… Love. You are always in my heart and I love you Mom, enjoy your day in Heaven!
